Bad "Signing"

Years ago, I went to a county fair with a guy that I'd been dating for quite a while. At one point we became separated, so I stretched on my tippy toes, scanning the crowd, trying to find my "sugah". Find him I did, and I watched in amazement as he had a very animated conversation with the carney operating the ferris wheel...in SIGN LANGUAGE.

"Wow, babe! I didn't know you knew "sign"!"

He told me that a hearing impaired guy had worked at his dad's shop for years, and over those years, had taught him American Sign Language.

I was intrigued . So much so, I eventually took classes (while getting my first bachelors), to become an interpreter for the deaf.

From the very first class, the spoken word was forbidden. No. spoken. language. PERIOD. Hell, the sign alphabet wasn't even taught, so I was damn glad I already knew it!

Classes went well. I learned quickly, and was fortunate to have a hunnie that could quiz me frequently.
A.S.L. is NOT easy, as it is a different language.

"Contrary to common belief, ASL [American Sign Language] is not derived from any spoken language, nor is it a visual code representing English. It is a unique and distinct language, one that does not depend on speech or sound. ASL has its own grammar, sentence construction, idiomatic usage, slang, style, and regional variations-- the characteristics that define any language."

Many "signed" words (verbs and nouns) are the same. Ex: The signs for "food" and "eat", are the same. (Stick wid me. I done tole ya' dis shit is hawd!)
Conversely, MANY signs are very simular to others, but may mean something altogether different.
Considerable care, and thought was encouraged for the novice, before signing (in depth), in front of any group.
Your's truly was to become a glaring example for taking that encouragement to heart.

I was late for class. VERY late, (being held up by my all-important waitressing job...a gurls' gotta EAT!), and I skidded into the classroom, practicing my"signed" excuse for the prof., in my mind.

He paused, mid-lesson, and waited.

What I meant to sign was, "So sorry me late. Me, before, at my job, work [both hands, in a fist, (letter "s"), tapping wrist to wrist], hard."

What I signed was, "So sorry me late. Me, before, at my job, FUCK (same as above, but wrist to back of opposing hand), hard."

Believe me when I say, hilarity and tremendous merriment ensued.


Now that, my friends, is the epitome of BAD SIGNING.