Blue and Yellow Makes Green

I dive. A LOT. It's my job, but I like nothing better than "gettin' wet", recreationally. ( "Divin"? "Gettin wet"? Sounds sexy, don't it?) I'm in the water so much, my skin is in a semi-continuous, prune-like state. I look like I need to be ironed.
Cave diving and cavern diving are particular loves. Unfortunately, the dive-sites I frequent are cold-water dives. Most average 56 degrees, year-round. Yea, yea, I know yer thinkin', "Where's the fun part?" Patience, Grasshopper.
Now, just like on land, staying warm underwater requires layers. I wear a "skin"(black, spandex garment that goes up to the neck, down to the wrists, and down to the ankles.), on top of a full-piece suit. Next comes a 3mm or 5mm neoprene wetsuit. Neoprene booties and skullcap round out this ensemble. Add your B.C.D.(bouyancy compensating device), fins, mask, dive comp, knife, lights, and whatever other stuff u chose to carry and you are oh so ready to hit that COLD-ASS water cause yer freakin' HOT.
Waddle on down and make your entry. Actually, this is the point where u don your fins(FINS, people! NOT flippers!). Walking in fins is vertually impossible without lookin' like a complete DORK.
That 56 degree water feels BLISSFUL....for about 5 seconds.
Now, if you're ever around a cold-water dive site, you will notice that groups, or even buddies will separate. This is proper, and completely acceptable, cold-water, dive-etiquette, straight from Mistress Manner's book, as we are.....PEEING. Ahhhhhh. Another layer of warmth, and it werks for me. You do it often, and it becomes an AUTOMATIC action.
Woe be it to the noviet that inadvertantly does not honor this etiquette, as I WILL seek u out, in the darkest depths, sneak up behind you, and shut off your air! Nasty fukker.
The other option to this cold-water dilema, is a drysuit. Drysuits are EXPENSIVE, so unless you are a die-hard, cold-water diver, pass. I am one.
Drysuits are made from water-proof materials; fullpiece, booties connected, with seals at the neck and wrists. You can wear clothing under them. Mmmmmm, more toastiness.
I looked long and hard, trying on many, until I made my purchase. Two thousand dollas, but, " I'll be damned if I'll freeze again or shorten a dive due to hypothermia", was my 'tude.
Two months later, and I was off to the Fla. panhandle for some divinnnnnn!!!
I gotta tell ya, Lil Toni was struttin', feelin' all superior n chit, to her neoprene-clad buddies. "Pussies! Imma do an hour n a half of down-time... pblthhhhh!"
Wooooo hooooo!!!! No mo continuous pissin', just to stay warm!
So, off I waddle, down to water's edge, don my fins, inflate the BCD, LOVING my drysuit, enter the water, swim out a bit, and, .......
PROMPTLY PEE IN IT!
Yea, I'm cool.
Fuk.